It Isn’t the Swinging ‘70s Anymore
You’ve probably seen TV shows or movies that take place in or around the seventies. There is often that one joke that revolves around a weird hanging chair in a random room of a family’s house. Some kid tries to get into it because he thinks it’s some type of swing. What he doesn’t know, but the audience does, is that it is a sex swing.
For whatever reason the sex swing hanging over the shag carpet is the only image used for a sex toy for a married couple. Why? That is in some was tame. The world is so large and the experiences so varied, why stay with the same old troupe of a sex swing? Granted, they can be a lot of fun, but don’t think that couple’s renounce their use of sex toys once they become officially together.
Sex Toy Use Doesn’t Mean It Isn’t Hot Already
The lack of imagery of sex toys in the couple’s bedroom could be connected to the false idea that couples are supposed to think that their partner does it all for them without the need for mechanical assistance. Women are supposed to weep for joy as soon as her partner’s privates enter the room. Men are supposed to hold a raging hard on for the entire night and only climax when they mentally allow themselves.
It couldn’t be farther from the truth. Couples couple not because of sex but because of the totality of the individuals. If sex were the ultimate factor then we would all be married to porn stars, or sex robots. Rather, sex is only a component of the equation. It could be that our life partners aren’t the best in bed or that they are having trouble finishing the deal. Honestly, it doesn’t matter. The sex could be the best thing in your life. Introducing toys into the couple’s bedroom doesn’t in any way degrade or comment on the quality of the sex.
Toys in the bedroom are purposefully introduced to enhance an already pleasurable experience. Think of it like a dessert. You may be preferential to chocolate chip cookies. Does that mean you will only eat chocolate chip cookies forever and nothing else? Hopefully exploring the boundaries of culinary delights is something that excites you and intrigues your taste buds. The same goes from sex. Toys and exploration are about pushing the pleasure further into areas unexplored as a couple. Toys may have been used independently or with other partners, but couples share a different level of connection that can be positively reinforced via toys.
What Do You Like?
If you are ready to introduce something feathery or silicon based into the bedroom you need to view the experience not as yourself but as a couple. What does you “the couple” enjoy? It could be something that you bring from prior experiences. Or it could be something that neither of you have ever done before. Remember it isn’t about some mechanical motion driven just to climax. This is about something much deeper as a couple.
When you are with someone you trust intrinsically, you can inherent explore your sexuality more deeply. Think about anal sex. Have you ever done it before? If not, how would you feel about trying something light? If you have done it before, then what are your thoughts on a tail?
What matters most in the bedroom is the trust to enjoy the experience and have fun. Toys are called toys and not tools because the main purpose isn’t too climax but to have fun.
What Toys Are You Comfortable With?
On the blog Dame Products, the credentialed sexologist Alexandra Fine, talks extensively on the different types of toys to introduce into the bedroom. Traditional sex toys are an excellent start. However, that isn’t the end of the story. You can introduce all of the standard female or make stimulation toys. You can also introduce couples-specific toys that focus on the pleasure experienced by both people.
However, even traditional toys can be experienced in new ways. Alone, you work on yourself with your favorite toy. When you are with your partner, they can work on you with it or pleasure you while you focus on yourself. With a partner you can free up your hands or expose another area for pleasure. Toys introduced into the bedroom elevate the experience by allowing the partners to explore the silky pleasures of their skin in new ways and in new motions. Don’t let the word “couple” keep you from having even more fun.