Many couples have unhealthy relationships with alcohol, often feeding each other’s habits and creating an atmosphere that is rife with arguments, fallings out and miscommunication.
Giving up alcohol as a couple can be a great way to not only live healthier and happier lives, but also to strengthen your relationship and enjoy a more fulfilling partnership. Of course, it might not be easy to do so and it can be challenging in different ways for not only different couples but different individuals too. A journey to sobriety can be done alone, but it may require alcohol rehab, counselling, support groups and more, so don’t be afraid to reach out and get what you need to boost your chances of success.
If it’s something you’re considering as a couple, here are five top tips to help you get through it together…
Set Shared Goals
Firstly, what you want to do as a couple is sit down and create goals that are clear and achievable. Setting goals as a couple is very different to doing so individually, but the essence is the same, you want to set out your motivations for quitting alcohol and what you want to achieve from it.
That could be improving your health, growing your relationship, or it could even be saving money for things like a house, car or holiday.
Write them down and revisit them regularly to remind yourself why you are on this journey together.
Create a Supportive Environment
One of the benefits of doing something as a team is that you’re in it together and can support each other. A good start is by making the environment more comfortable and supportive. Remove any alcohol from your home to keep temptation to a minimum, while also think of activities to enjoy that don’t revolve around drinking.
Team up together and create a list of things that you’d like to try over the course of a month or a year and plan those activities in. It could be doing more exercise, taking part in a cookery class, maybe even learning a new language. You can find some amazing new hobbies that don’t rely on alcohol and can be part of real, positive change in both of your lives.
Communicate Openly
Open communication is really key to getting through this as a couple. You should discuss your feelings and challenges regularly and keep checking in with each other to see how you’re getting on. By sharing these you can keep track on each other’s progress and provide them with support and relief during any difficult periods your loved one may be having.
It is, however, important to respect each other’s boundaries and coping mechanisms, while you should be understanding and encouraging of those too.
Celebrate Milestones Together
Celebrating milestones is a great way to stay motivated and acknowledge your progress. Mark achievements such as a week, a month, or even six months of sobriety with meaningful rewards or shared experiences.
Consider treating yourselves to a special dinner, a weekend getaway, or investing in something you both enjoy. Celebrations like these reinforce your commitment and provide positive reinforcement for your efforts.
Seek External Support When Needed
While supporting each other is essential, don’t hesitate to seek external help if needed. Joining a support group, such as Alcoholics Anonymous or SMART Recovery, can provide additional resources and encouragement from others who understand your journey.
Couples therapy or counselling can also be beneficial, especially if drinking was a significant part of your relationship dynamic. A professional can help you navigate any challenges and build healthier patterns of communication and connection.