Monday, 07 May 2018 02:11

One Simple Way to Stand Out on a First Date

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We’ve recently started noticing that every time we ask a new client what they like to do for fun, their eyes glaze over. 

Nine out of ten of them cannot answer the question. Most of the time, they say ‘working out, hiking or spending time with friends’.

That’s fine. No judgement here but since we’re in the business of  helping people shine and make a remarkable  first impression as we introduce them to their match, it’s important to consider this:

If you’re not rocking your own world, how do you expect anyone worthy to want to be in it?

We live in a culture where our self-worth is tied to our net worth and living a fulfilling life means being busy. But boring lives attract boring people. Having a variety of interests that go beyond work is super attractive. People want to be around interesting people who are engaged with the world and their own life. If you’re looking for a well-rounded, fun, engaging, attractive person with whom to build a life, start paying attention to how you’re living your own life.

Here are four ways for you to stand out and show that you’re living a fun, interesting and engaging life:

Have good stories ready. If you want to show someone that you’re living an interesting life, have some good anecdotes ready to share. It’s more dynamic to show who you are through stories than statements.  Another great way to be interesting is to ask interesting questions. Like ‘What’s your idea of paradise?’ or ‘What is the craziest thing you’ve experienced on a trip?’ or ‘What’s something surprising about you?’

Be around people who inspire you to live a cool life. Jim Rohn said ‘You’re the average of the five people you spend the most time with’.  Are the people in your life interesting, positive, and adventurous who encourage you to explore life?  Or are they judgmental, close-minded and somewhat limiting?  The few who are closest to us have the greatest impact on our way of thinking, our self-esteem and our decisions. So take stock of the value that people add (or remove) in your life. It will greatly influence who you attract.

Be true to what moves you. Saying traveling (or anything else that you do infrequently) is your passion when you barely go on one trip a year for 10 days is a holiday not a passion. If you truly enjoy discovering new places and cultures, start planning more trips or at least research where you’d like to go so that you have something interesting to share. You owe it to yourself to discover what lights your fire. Why else are we here?

Pay attention to your everyday choices. The quality of your life is determined by the choices you make each day. Your lifestyle is about doing what you value consistently. It’s not about waiting for when you’re in a relationship to do cool things. That’s lazy and safe. Start small. Integrate one new or different experience every month. Strive to thrive in your life, not just survive and you will be a magnet for exciting, interesting people who do the same.

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Cristina Morara

Cristina and Andrea Morara are dating experts and own Stellar Hitch, a boutique matchmaking company catering to upscale professionals that incorporates dating coaching and image consulting in their matchmaking method. Specializing in bringing out people’s best qualities --on the inside and out—before they introduce them to their match, Stellar Hitch leads with a “dolce vita” approach to dating. They encourage clients to slow down, be present and bring their best and most playful self to the table because “it’s less about what you are doing and more about who you are being”.

The couple is currently working on the book "The Dolce Vita of Dating: How A Vintage Approach To Romance Will Lead You Straight To The Altar."

Contact Cristina at cristina@stellarhitch.com.

Visit www.stellarhitch.com for more information.

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