Another year has gone by and you still have not met your ‘person’. You’ve either not made dating a priority or you’ve chosen the wrong people or you have no idea how to attract the right ones. Whatever the challenge, you owe it to yourself to do something different.
Here are 8 things you can do to tilt the odds in your favor to meet your mate in the new year:
1. Upgrade your appearance. Choose one thing to modify or improve. It could be something as simple as a new hairstyle, growing a beard or hiring a trainer; or even changing your entire wardrobe, getting a shot of botox or whitening your teeth. Do whatever it takes to get that extra spring in your step. Confidence is sexy.
2. Be loud and clear about your intentions. Tell everyone (friends, family, colleagues, the Starbucks barista) that you’re single and would like to meet someone. Ask them if they know anyone. They may not have access to your soul mate (or they may!) but it will get you out there and help you understand what you want or don’t want.
3. Throw a dinner party where everyone has to bring a single friend. It works best when nobody knows the person (as if you’re introducing a ‘new recipe’ that everyone is curious about). New connections will expand your social network and increase your chances of meeting someone.
4. Respect the Rule of Three. Most singles have a long list of what they want in a mate; few know what they really need. Streamline your list and whittle it down to the top three qualities that you need to thrive in your ideal relationship. What do you truly need to go the distance?
5. Accept that compatibility is overrated. John Gottman (founder of The Gottman Institute) says “how a couple interacts is the single, most fundamental aspect to creating a successful relationship. It’s not who you are or what you do that will help you find the perfect mate. It’s how you speak to each other, how well you get along, and how you move through time together”. In other words, YOU create compatibility so stop looking for it right away.
6. Reset your expectations. Most matchmakers will admit that their toughest clients are the ones with unrealistic expectations. If you keep running into the same patterns, it has everything to do with you. Are you choosing to be with people who are ready and capable of building a relationship with you? It’s pretty easy to figure out. People always show you who they are in due time.
7. Live the life you want to live NOW. Too often singles talk about all the fun things they would do with their life if they were in a relationship. Don’t wait to build an interesting life. If you’re not out there having fun, being active, cultivating your social life or indulging in your passions, the chances of you meeting someone is low. If you don’t’ think you’re worth it, why would anybody else?
8. Hire a professional. You’re busy building or running a company. You don’t have time to date or you’ve tried online dating and it’s been a nightmare. You’re ready to meet The One but have no time or energy to commit to the process. Consider hiring a matchmaker. Their (our) job is to make dating easier for you and find you what you’re looking for by selecting the best from all of the rest in a confident, elegant manner.
Here’s to a supreme ’17! The best is yet to come….