Friday, 19 October 2012 01:07

Industry Tips >> The Beauty of No. Two letters that help you gain confidence and lose weight.

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I’ve experienced genuine terror. Not from staring into the face of a hungry lion or looking down the barrel of a shotgun. And no I’m not an extreme sports fanatic or a solo trekker in the Himalayas. The terror I feel appears when I have to find my voice and tell a client (or any person for that matter) no.

Yes, one of my roles as a producer is usually finding a way to say yes; yes you can hang upside down as human piñatas and be beaten with sticks, yes I can get you a reindeer in July tomorrow, yes those pants look great on you, but how can I find the way to say no and not take on the stigma of being the bad guy?

I for one don’t like looking in the face of my favorite rock star, client, or kid and crushing their spirit and possibly their dream of doing something they have always wanted to do, but I’ve come to discover that saying no to one thing can be a way of saying yes to another.

Each time I say no for the right reasons, safety, fiscal responsibility, or for my own sanity, I am empowering others and myself to be creative in problem solving and think outside the box.  And when said with willingness to learn and a lack of righteousness, no can command respect and appreciation from others.

If you find yourself challenged with drawing a boundary or protecting the best interest of your client or yourself, consider trying on these approaches to boost your confidence and create relationships that honor collaboration and possibility.

•  No means know: Be informed.  Making good decisions depends on having accurate information so take the time to talk to all the players involved and get their input.  If you still feel no is the best answer, saying no shows the courage of your convictions and your belief in what you are doing.

• Role Play: Who doesn’t enjoy a good fantasy now and again: oh, that may be too much information, but if you’re trying to be certain you are making the best decision, try on the other idea and see how it fits.  Play the role of the yes person and you may find worthwhile elements to work with going forward.

• Accentuate the positive: Every idea no matter how crazy it may sound has opportunities and buried treasures in it.  Acknowledge the creativity it took to come up with the idea and you’ll be paving the way for alternative suggestions and feel much better about saying no.


• Conserve Energy: Yes, be green in all possible things but in this case I mean if you say, "Yes," when you want to say, "No," you’ll feel resentful if you end up doing what you don’t really want to do.  There’s no doubt this will deplete you, drain your energy and can be avoided if you speak your truth and say no.  And the weight you are carrying from not being yourself will be lifted off your shoulders.

• Be Kind to Yourself: Speaking your truth is a courageous act and may not always be met with appreciation and consensus but acknowledging yourself for your honesty and willingness builds that muscle and makes it easier the next time.  Reward yourself. Yogurt with toppings for everyone!!!

P.S.  If you want to see the time I said yes to the human piñata request…check this video out.

Foo Fighters This Video Sucks

See you on set,



Read 2684 times Last modified on Friday, 19 October 2012 01:24
Jessie Marcus

An award-winning producer, Jessie is known for her ingenuity, positive outlook, calm disposition and sense of humor, all valuable skills when working with networks, studios, and agencies with strong personalities in high-pressure situations.

With over a decade of experience as a freelance Producer, Jessie can be found shooting projects on the high seas with Disney, backstage with BET, on the streets of NYC with USA network and Freeform, as well as worldwide with the likes of Oxygen, TBS, E! Entertainment, and others.

Her numerous credits include projects ranging from commercials, movie and TV promos to music videos, co-branded entertainment, magazine shows, interactive media, documentaries, and PSA’s. She loves what she does and it shows!

Jessie completed a 3-year Master’s Program in Spiritual Psychology, adding another tool to her bag of tricks and bringing those skills to the fast-paced, quick turnaround, production world as well as to her life coaching practice.

Contact Jessie Marcus

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