“Hey, I got to run, but this hummus discussion shouldn’t end here, how about we connect later this week to further delve into the deep secrets of hummus and grocery fair? I got hummus recipes I can send you that will rock your world. “
She laughs. Do you really? Maybe not, but you made her laugh and you will definitely scour the web for recipes when you get home. You also said you had to go so you are not Creepy McCreeper that is following her around. You continue on:
“Some of these recipes are dug up from the Egyptian tombs from the 1200’s.”
She laughs again. “Sure.” (Maybe out of pity, maybe out of interest).
You quickly reply, “Great! Can I get your number to keep you posted on our hummus adventure?”
Score!!! Nice work champ. You have done what 85% of men are afraid to do…approach a woman in a public, strike up a conversation, and then ask for her number. You had the winning combination of being your authentic self, splashed with humor, and a heavy dose of lightheartedness and fun. Even if you went down in flames, you are still a champ for doing it.
Now, it is the NEXT DAY and you want to call her. Follow those instincts! Throw away that three day rule. We live in a fast paced culture now, and there will be plenty of other blokes taking a swing at her while she is at work, at happy hour with friends, on the way home, and even on-line while she g-chats with her sister. So keep that awesome energy you created in Aisle 3 alive with a follow-up phone call the next day. If you text her, I will personally come out of your phone and slap you. I have done it, so don’t try me. Gentlemen call, boys text. Trust me, you will rise above another 85% of the men out there who are throwing 140 characters on a SMS and waiting multiple days to follow up.
You give her a call after work:
“Hey Linda, its ________, your local hummus aficionado from Aisle 3.”
She immediately laughs, “Ha, ha…of course I know who you are _____.”
Perfect! You already stand out. Why? Well, you followed up immediately and you created a point of interest with her. You both are now hummus pals.
“I just wanted to check in with your purchase. See, actually I am an undercover hummus agent and need to make sure the purchase went alright.”
Even if she thinks you are the biggest goofball at this point, you definitely stand out and you are making her laugh, which is ALWAYS good. Keep it light and fun.
She chimes in:
“Ha! You are so funny. I was actually laughing last night when I took the hummus out.”
Fantastic. You were memorable, fun, and put a smile on her face after the moment. Now…keep it short and sweet and close it out. You want to save all this great banter for the DATE. But, before you do, do your research. Don’t go to the obvious “Let’s grab a drink or dinner” junk. Every other guy from Cubicle 1 to 99 asks her out and suggests, “Let’s get drinks after work. Pick you up at 8?”
No way, buddy. You stand out. You are not like the rest. You break the mold and she always remembers you first out of all the other suitors. You knew you had the hummus, grocery store, and a neighborhood connection, assuming she shops at her local grocery store. So you start googling ideas. Got it!
“So I feel it is only right, that with all this talk, we take a real whack at this hummus thing. This Saturday is that great farmer’s market downtown. Why don’t I pick you up, we can head down there, grab up some goodies to make our own concoction. We can then head over to the ______park, grab a picnic table and do some outdoor chef’ing. I will bring all kitchen tools needed. We can also pick up some side pieces to make a nice little lunch.”
She replies, “Wow. Ummm, sure. Sounds fun and I can honestly say, this will be a first.”
Yes sir. She is excited, intrigued, and probably a little concerned over how this is all going to work out, but that is perfect. You stand out from the rest, you took charge, and you came up with one fun and exciting date. Even if the hummus is a disaster, you two will be working together, picking out ingredients in the sun, mashing chick peas at the park, and then preparing a nice little bite on a beautiful Saturday afternoon. Sounds like a great way to see if you have any sense of chemistry with someone.
Of course, you could always go out for a chai latte and regurgitate those 10 questions that come out on first dates…or you can break the mold and have some fun and see where the day takes you!
Seize the Date,
Christian Anderson is a dating coach in Los Angeles and runs the coaching business Let’s Talk Dating. He helps women and men get out of their own way to vastly improve their dating life and create the path towards a healthy relationship. Visit his site at www.letstalkdatingonline.com.