Thursday, 05 April 2018 06:30

Let Me Fat in Peace

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Let us all give a big round of applause for Cardi B, easily one of the most quotable people on the planet.

A few weeks ago, Cardi B posted a video on Instagram where people commented that she looked like she was hiding a “Kylie Jenner secret” – and how does she respond?



“Let me fat in peace.” 



Unfortunately, many Fat Girls are all too familiar with being called ‘pregnant’.

Unless you live under a rock, you know that Fat People are each built differently. Not every Fat Girl is going to have a flat stomach, wide hips, and perfectly double-chin-less face.  Most Fat Girls have bellies and that is okay!

- Confession time -

Hi, my name is Cassandra and I don’t carry all my weight in my ass – I carry it in my gut – and there is not much I can do about changing my body ‘type’.

Most of the time, when I get questions about being pregnant, I get uncomfortable because, well, f*** you? Instead of getting awkward and letting the interaction eat away at my self-esteem, I look my offender dead in the eye and reply, “No, I’m just Fat.”

Then I violently laugh while they eat their words.

It is at this moment that I have done two things:

  1. I’ve pointed out their ignorance, and
  2. I’ve acknowledged that I’m just fat – and being fat is okay.

There are few things more empowering than a Fat Girl owning her fatness.

Being comfortable enough to take the negativity out of Fat gives you the permission to accept yourself, despite your ‘flaws’.

When I was younger, I remember feeling so attacked by Fat. It seemed like the word belonged to me – like a brand burned to my skin. Whenever someone would say it, even if it wasn’t pointed at me, I felt a stinging pain in the pit of my stomach and a familiarity as if someone were calling my name.

Fat is not a bad word, but the connotation surrounding it may trigger painful experiences.

To this day, a little part of me cringes when I hear or see Fat because, for a long time, I let the word control and define me. It was a word I never called myself but other people used to call me. By giving the word power, I give the people using it against me power – now, I opt to take that power away from them. To this I say –

“You can only call me Fat if I’ve given you permission to do so. You can only make me feel ashamed if I feel ashamed of myself – and I am not.”

Owning your fatness does not magically erase years of pain overnight, but if you wake up tomorrow just a little closer to loving your body and accepting yourself just as you are then you are one step closer to…happiness? Enlightenment? Nirvana? I don’t know, but it sure beats hating yourself.

So the next time someone asks if you’re pregnant or tries to make you feel ashamed of your size, own your fatness and tell them to mind their own f***ing business.


Read 983 times Last modified on Friday, 06 April 2018 17:50
Cassandra Appleby

Cassandra Appleby is a marketing student at San Francisco State University, set to graduate in May. Being plus size her entire life, she is passionate about promoting body positivity and empowering others to find their confidence.

There is a serious problem with how the world values Fat People.

A Fat Girl’s Guide is a series of articles aimed toward breaking negative stereotypes surrounding fatness. “Fat” is a word riddled with pain, bias, and stereotypes. Cassandra’s goal is to break these connotations into easily digestible, bite-size chunks and hopefully make you laugh along the way.

What does it mean to be a Fat Girl? Well, it means that you don’t have to be a “girl” at all. These articles represent things fellow Fat Girls, Boys, Non-Binaries, Transsexuals, and the like go through.

A Fat Girl is…
• Anyone who has been marginalized for their size (regardless of gender, sexuality, race, age, disability – you get the picture).
• Anyone who has been told they are not valuable because of their appearance.
• Anyone who is tired of following society’s rules on how we should look, act, perform, and exist in this world.

How does Cassandra navigate being a Fat Girl in one of the most vain cities in the world? Well, read on.

Connect with Cassandra  |  |

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