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Wednesday, 07 February 2018 04:22

7 Things Your Fat Friend is Tired of Hearing

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Every Fat Girl navigates through life hearing words and phrases that, in the end, try to further body shaming culture. Well, guess what? We’re tired of it!

With body positivity gaining traction as it is, we could all use a little education on how to be more loving and accepting of all body sizes. Here are a few things just about every Fat Girl hears and here is why these phrases suck.

1. FAT 

The other F-word. The new and improved Fat Girl is fat and proud!  We are not so much tired of hearing it as we are tired of hearing it used against us. We are fat. We have fat. We are also living, breathing, thinking creatures with feelings, hopes, and dreams just like the rest of you – and being fat does not change that fact! 

This just in: ‘Fat’ is not a bad word! Oh wait, that is old news.

2. “Oh, you have a boyfriend?”

Um…YES, WE DO. Are you surprised that someone finds us to be sexy, smart, fun, and basically the entire package? Because we are not.

3. “That looks so flattering on you!”


Also known as ‘the other, other F-word’. To be ‘flattering’ implies that you have done a good job at convincing people you look thinner than you actually are. It is okay to tell your fat friend that they look good because they look good and not because they have conned you into thinking they are attractive.

4. “Pretty for a fat girl”


Or ‘such a pretty face’, ‘such pretty hair’, ‘such beautiful skin’. All these are backhanded compliments that suggest fat and beauty do not mix. We are not ‘pretty for a fat girl’, we’re just plain pretty!

5. “I’m really concerned about your weight”


You are not concerned about our weight because our weight has nothing to do with you. Who are you to be spending your free time thinking about someone else’s weight? Mind your own business! This is nothing more than criticism feigned as concern. It is a proven fact that body shaming leads to an increase in eating disorders which means your ‘concern’ typically causes more harm than good. Real concern comes out of love, wanting friends to love themselves and not feel insecure in your presence.

6. Any fashion advice that tells us to “cover up”

Now revealing the new and improved Fat Girl 2.0 – she loves stylish clothes! We are not limited to wearing outfits that cover our arms, belly, or thighs. If we want to show a little skin, we do so. Fashion is about expressing yourself through clothing and if that means you see a Fat Girl wearing a crop top, get used to it!

7. “I feel so fat right now”


Do I even need to explain this?

Read 2536 times Last modified on Monday, 08 October 2018 19:27
Cassandra Appleby

Cassandra Appleby is a marketing student at San Francisco State University, set to graduate in May. Being plus size her entire life, she is passionate about promoting body positivity and empowering others to find their confidence.

There is a serious problem with how the world values Fat People.

A Fat Girl’s Guide is a series of articles aimed toward breaking negative stereotypes surrounding fatness. “Fat” is a word riddled with pain, bias, and stereotypes. Cassandra’s goal is to break these connotations into easily digestible, bite-size chunks and hopefully make you laugh along the way.

What does it mean to be a Fat Girl? Well, it means that you don’t have to be a “girl” at all. These articles represent things fellow Fat Girls, Boys, Non-Binaries, Transsexuals, and the like go through.

A Fat Girl is…
• Anyone who has been marginalized for their size (regardless of gender, sexuality, race, age, disability – you get the picture).
• Anyone who has been told they are not valuable because of their appearance.
• Anyone who is tired of following society’s rules on how we should look, act, perform, and exist in this world.

How does Cassandra navigate being a Fat Girl in one of the most vain cities in the world? Well, read on.

Connect with Cassandra

www.cassandraappleby.com  |  instagram.com/cassandraappleby  |   twitter.com/cassandrappleby

More in this category: Why You Should Date a Fat Girl »

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1 comment

  • Comment Link Tammy Dekel Wednesday, 07 February 2018 11:43 posted by Tammy Dekel

    Way to go Cassandra!! You have such amazing grace, conviction and talent! You are a beautiful person in every way one can be beautiful!! As your Voice Coach, let me also say that your voice is an incredible gift! I am so proud of who are, blessed to have you as a student and to have you in my life. Love you bunches! Xo


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